I am a master in origami, a student in romance, and a fugitive in Austria. I am the subject of several top secret files. When I'm bored, I create artificial hearts in my basement. Fashion critics from California to Sweden drool over my unique line of knitted, yet fitted, chaps. I am in the witness protection program, yet I receive letters from fans daily. I have collected the appropriate number of box tops to fund my own school. I have undertaken several missions for MI6. I never sleep; on rare occasions when I do sleep, I stand. Gravity is of no concern to me. I do not require oxygen. I have not, however, mastered VBA.