I have been looking for this also, and I had a hard time finding out how to access the individual items of a xlist...
This is the way I finally did it:
in your itemTpl, add a class to your < div >, using the property 'id' of your model:
itemTpl:'< div class="my_list_item_{id}"> ... content ... < /div>'
the tricky part is that if you want to set the background color of the whole item area, you have to access to < div > with class 'x-item-label' that is wrapping your itemTpl < div >.
Here is how I did it (for the first item as an example):
Ext.select('.my_list_item_1').first().up('div.x-list-item-label').addCls('background_item');
where 'background_item' is a CSS style, defining your background color.
(Since there is no way (at least that I know of) to get the index count of your items in the 'itemTpl' config, I had to use to automatic 'id' property of my model/store.
Note that if you apply filtering/sorting/... on your store, this property will not be sorted anymore. So if you want to link the order displayed in your list to the 'id' property, you have to do something like 'Ext.StoreManager.get('MyStore').getAt(indexInList).get('id') )
Hope this helps...